Ask any parent what their main source of frustration is with their teen and you will soon hear about how hard it is to get these sweet but sometimes surly creatures to talk. Seriously, how on earth is a parent to talk to a teen about sensitive topics like medicine abuse if they can’t even get their teen to talk about how their day was? Well, I am here to fill you in on exactly how to get your teens to talk to you and engage in a conversation with you. I wrote a book on this topic, I’ve spoken to hundreds of teens over the years and I even raised one. So, I guess you could say I am in the know. And now, I am going to share my secrets with you.
Research shows that teens make better decisions, deal more effectively with peer pressure and even have better self-esteem if their parents consistently talk to them about sensitive topics in just the right way. Having said that, let me start by giving up my secrets:
1. Keep in mind that your teens really do want to talk to you.
2. Teens respond better to indirect requests for information.
3. Now, once your teens start talking, do NOT interrupt. Let them keep talking.
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4. By all means, do not become emotional in response to what they are telling you.
AND…
5. Be physically available and present to listen.
Look, these are just some guidelines. Try them. I promise that they will make the dialogue go more smoothly with your teens. Every topic including drugs and sex needs to be discussed with your teens. No topic should be off the proverbial table. Not talking about things does not make issues go away. Good luck and let me know how these tips serve you!
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About the Author
Dr. Barbara Greenberg is a clinical psychologist who specializes in the treatment of adolescents and their parents. She was the Director of an Inpatient Adolescent Unit for several years. She is now in private practice in Fairfield County CT. and is the Adolescent Consultant at Silver Hill Hospital in New Canaan CT.
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